Pray, Refocus and Reflect

Tuesday was a rare day for me – I was able to work at home and spend the day with my little guy and my husband.

Problems started around 3 o’clock when a bad attitude developed out of nowhere (in me). We had a great day and we were getting ready for a family campfire in the evening and I could see myself ruining the entire night.

There was no need for my attitude. No one thing seemed to trigger it. It just crept in on me.  I could feel tension building and stress mounting.

Sure a campfire was going to be nice (if I didn’t ruin it) but there was so much to be done in the house.  I was switching in to high gear – Mary Gear.  Focusing on what needed done.

Pray

Thankfully I recognized what was happening to me.  When my husband had to leave the house I took the opportunity to pray.

With my dear little on in his room playing I hit the bed and asked for help.

No long drawn out prayer, just an honest cry from breaking heart.  I asked God to give me peace and grace and I apologized for being short tempered with my little man.

Refocus

I was focused on doing. A place we mothers seem to slip into quite often don’t we?

What needs done

What’s on the the to do list.

Oh the time I have wasted in years past doing!

What about being?

Being a mom.

Being a wife.

Being in the presence of God?

I believe we are called human beings not human doings.

“There, in the presence of the LORD your God, you and your families shall eat and shall rejoice in everything you have put your hand to, because the LORD your God has blessed you. ~ Deuteronomy 12:7

House work, homework, blog work and your job all necessary and vital parts of our days but they are not all we are to do.

I fall into this trap more often than I care to admit.

We were sharing last night at bible study about various things and one woman said “I put all the toys away before we go to bed…why? No one see the floor anyway..everyone is sleeping!”

I had to laugh. How true is that!

I do the same thing.  It gives me a sense of peace, especially in the mornings when I come down stairs to a  semi-organized living room and kitchen.

Lord help me!

My peace shouldn’t come from a clean house it should come from The House Cleaner himself.  The one who comes in, to us, and cleans out the junk.  Renewing us and rebuilding us every day.

“Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will.” ~ Romans 12:2

Reflect

There was a reason behind my seemingly unnecessary Mary Moments

I reflected on it yesterday and the Lord showed me what was happening.

It was as if I was going through withdraw.

What? Withdraw?

My husband began his journey through giving up chewing tobacco products yesterday but it seemed I was going through withdraw, not him.

The Lord showed me that the enemy was trying to use me to be short-tempered and grumpy as a way to cause a stressful situation for my husband.  If you’ve ever been a tobacco user you know that when you’re stressed you’re body then craves a nicotine fix.

If I could stress him out then he’d want a chew.  The enemy doesn’t want my husband having victory.

Meant for Harm but Used for Good

“You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.” ~ Genius 50:20

Still reflecting on this situation, this morning the Lord showed me that He used my Mary Moment for my good.  Now I have a fresh perspective of how my husband is feeling during this time of withdraw and detoxification.

I can not just have empathy but I can relate and I can help create physical peace here in the home to ease stress for him.

After all, our homes should be a place of refuge for our husbands, and others, from the battle the rages around them in the world.

Do you have Mary Mode Moments? How have you learned to Be and not to Do all the time?

Until Next Time,

Be Blessed

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When God Has Other Plans

I can proudly (which may be part of the problem) say with God’s grace and wisdom my husband and I are making great progress in reducing our debt and tightening up our spending.

Each year for the several years we have sat down and figured out what we would do with our income tax return each of us having a list and then comparing it and coming to an agreement.  The past few years have led to more responsible things like eliminating debt, major vehicle repairs and the like.

In January I spent three or four days mulling around ideas in my head on what the best use of our tax refund would be.  Some fun stuff, some necessary expenditures and some debt reduction.  A good mix for Brad to take care of a few things he wanted to do and I had peace of mind that we were working on debt.  It seemed like a good plan.

Brad greed with the ideas and so it was settled.

Then along came God.

He said to me  “Let him buy it. He needs to make the decision.”

To read the rest of this post come visit the new More Than Four Walls launched 4/9/12.  Here’s a direct link to this post.